Knitting Nightmares

So last night I had two knitting nightmares, the first of which was waking and inescapable.

Knitting Nightmare #1. After nearly 3 weeks of work on My Old Man’s anniversary sweater (deadline: February 10), I joined the body and the sleeves together, thinking I was in the home stretch now. Just a few more inches and some raglan decreases and I’d be done. Only after joining the sleeves, putting underarm stitches on waste yarn, and knitting one full round, I discovered something horrible. The sleeves are long enough for an orangutan!!!

I was distraught. My gauge was right on, and I followed the pattern to a T. A couple of weeks ago, I caught a mistake in the pattern and emailed the designed about it; she confirmed that it was a mistake (it’s a raglan sweater in sizes infant to XXL adult, and only the adult sizes large and up had a small mistake with not small consequences). Now I’m thinking I should’ve clarified a little more how to adjust the pattern. That’s the only thing I’ve come up with as the source of my extra-long arms.

At any rate, I spent half an hour this morning unknitting the round I had knit last night in preparation for frogging the tops of the arms. I will need to take at least 2 inches off and maybe make my own recalculations for the right fit.

The sad part of all of this is that I was sitting there all upset about the sweater when My Old Man asked me about a possible knitting project for another family member. In suggesting I go ahead and work on the other project he added, “Because that sweater you’re working on is just for you, right?” If I had not been in such a state of panic about the sweater sleeves, I could’ve covered, but in my fragile state I broke. So now it won’t be a surprise. Waaaah. I was so looking forward to the “reveal.”

Knitting Nightmare #2. I can’t remember the details of the dream now, but I awoke at 12:30 from a nightmare that had knitting all over the place. At the time I remembered all the details. But when I woke up this morning I could only remember one thing – in a state of desperation, I wondered if I could kill my attacker with my knitting needles (which, of course, I had with me). The only question was: Addi Turbos, or bamboo double-pointed needles? Of course I chose the dpns – they have much sharper points. And besides, I wouldn’t want to get blood all over my Addis!

2 thoughts on “Knitting Nightmares

  1. I can sympathize with you about the monster sweater.Before my husband & I were married I decided to surprise him with a sweater for Christmas, made from bulky Lopi. Key word here is “surprise” – I kept it hidden in a bag & worked on it at lunch at work. The ultimate “surprise” was on me when a few days before Christmas I took it out to show co-workers, & guess what…yes, same size as yours!!! Fortunately his birthday is in January…Glad to see you’re a sock virgin too on the Sock Team – GOOD LUCK! Sue.

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